What to Do When You Can't Do
Since the dawn of time, men have always been the designated hunter-gatherer. Even in today's liberal times, it is still the men who bring home the bacon, although they have been joined by women now. Thus, they are expected to solve problems, rather than create them. This is probably why most men are reluctant to talk about their problems, especially sexual ones.
A lot of couples experience problems in the bedroom. It can be quite stressful to a relationship, especially if no one wants to talk about it. The good news is that you are not alone. Many have faced performance issues, and thus, help and treatments are available. The bad news is that you need to work at it, there are no quick fixes.
Like any performer, you may experience some off nights even though you are aroused. Don't worry, this is normal. But when impotence becomes a regular issue, its a good idea to stop and think about possible underlying causes. Some men are set in their ways and prefer one position over another. So when they mix it up, their little buddy refuses to cooperate.
If this is the case, talking to your partner is usually the best course of action. It may not be an issue for your special someone, and you can find other ways of satisfying each other. Talking usually helps, and you can save money on therapists who will just tell you to go talk to her, anyway.
If talk is cheap, and your penis stays resolutely limp, then ask yourself if there are other possible causes for its uncooperative behavior. A commonly overlooked cause is anxiety and depression. This can easily be remedied with medication. Be warned though, that there might be some mild and short-lived effect on your sexual function.
There are chronic illnesses that can also cause impotence. Diabetes, heart disease, prostrate issues, multiple sclerosis and even back problems are only some of the medical conditions that can affect your sex life. Seek medical attention for the illness and discuss your treatment options with your doctor.
There are times though, that you may just be overthinking the whole thing. You may just be too tired or stressed about other areas on your life to get your motor running. Or she's probably just not your type. The point is that there will be times when you fail to rise to the occasion. You are not a sex machine, even though that's how you advertise yourself.
If you feel that any of the foregoing conditions are present in your case, or you are still experiencing the same problem, then by all means, see a doctor. He will make an assessment of your issues and present you with options.
You may be given medications or advised to see a therapist.
On a final note, there are men who balk at the idea of talking about intimate details with a sex therapists. Don't refuse just because you feel shy or embarassed talking to a stranger. But remember, these therapists are trained to just that. They have probably heard every story there is about impotence. You might just be surprised at how much help you can get from them.